It’s Spring! It’s officially time for daffodils and tulips, and where do I keep finding myself? In my basement. I’m feeling a drive to pull out the old junk, clear off the spaces, and vacuum out the corners. There’s nothing new about Spring Cleaning and the desire to shine a light into the cobwebby corners, but I can’t help but think about the drive behind that desire. It’s not passive, is it? There’s something inside that’s restless, that wants to stretch and grow and become. I don’t think it’s just me; I think this is a human thing, and I think it makes sense that it can wake up with the Spring.
For some, maybe that restlessness inside is something totally new, like a fresh idea. For others, maybe it’s something that has been stewing for a while, but hasn’t yet found a way to emerge. Or maybe it’s something we have mixed feelings about: “I know I should do something, but it’s super complicated, and I’m not sure I can.” It’s hard to be motivated and stuck at the same time!
How can we shine a brighter light on the change we want to see?
What would it be like to welcome those outcomes into our lives?
And where is the stuckness; the ambivalence? The push/pull of desiring change?
When I seek change in my own life (or self), it helps a lot to really highlight what that change would look like. What satisfaction would it bring? What freedom would it create? Would I feel lighter? Instead of focusing on the reasons change is hard (because yeah, it’s often hard), it helps to put more energy into the desire. To get to a point where I’m thinking “I really want that!”
Sometimes, though, you need to give some space and validation to those difficulties that we face, too. There can be a lot of emotions there, and sometimes they need some attention. Fear, grief, stress, shame…all of these feelings are valid and real, and sometimes you need to spend some time with them before moving forward. Being heard, being believed, and being truly present with a supportive person might sometimes be the medicine that those feelings need. There’s nothing wrong with this! This is tending to those cobwebby corners in the basement, and it can be scary!
Whether accentuating the positive results, holding space for the difficult emotions, or getting the plans for action down on paper, this is the work that I do, and the work that I love! It’s super easy to get bogged down in our conflated thoughts as we try to push ourselves forward. It can feel like we’re pushing against something, something that doesn’t want to move. Working with a good coach can help clear the layers of dust, clarify the thoughts and motivation, and lay the path ahead. It becomes less about pushing against, and more about lifting up.
In case you’re interested, here are a couple of podcasts that discuss change, motivation, decision making, and life choices.
The Hidden Brain – Who Do You Want To Be?
Brene Brown – Courage In The Midst Of Change
And, as always, if there’s change you want to explore in your life, let’s check out the possibilities! Email me at [email protected] or book an appointment at nurturelifecoaching.com. Onward and upward, my friends!